It’s been a while.

Even though we are all source awareness ( a Timothy Conway phrase) the mind still plays it’s tricks. I am dedicated to see my sadhana through. I believe in a relative life after death and relatively we are souls; it is just a label but it seems to help at the moment.

After completing an online forum where one is guided to see through the self; the ‘self’ as a struggling mind still arises all well and good here and with it certain compulsions to alleviate suffering aka chronic tension. Thankfully I am working with this relative shadow self. I am observing the personnas in this cylce of  dealing with them. I am not fighting them off or trying to fix things.

This all seems so slow to ‘me’ after so many joyful openings and peace. But it ain’t over till it is. Paradoxically it is over and never began lol from the absolute view.

I am using a mantra again, one given via email from a seasoned well educated realized person. Email you may say. Yes and from my 25 years of spiritual endeavour with grace it’s powerful and helping smooth some kundalini issues I’ve had.

As a man I admire says ‘see you on the flip side’.


All Is You.

‘I’ as awareness is that which remains as its objectless self unchanging. Once realized that ‘I’ the ego mind of identification which is ever changing thought, memory, experience, body attachment is not you but rather the awareness ‘I’ is, peace and silence become more pre-dominant in moments especially where others are absent.

Then there is the realization that all this is in fact you….this ‘I’ awareness. The material paradigm is a nonsense all is Awareness, Consciousness, Self. A sense of other collapses.

Love and joy then become more of an on going experience. As everything is you and all is as it should be moment by moment by moment.


Keep being aware that all that is sensed is sensed by objectless presence. Everything and everybody encountered is done so by sensing, there are no ‘things’ outside that. Even with psychic phenomena that to is only experienced by our senses.

Sensing is only known in awareness. Sensing is awareness. Hence all perceived things are this very same awareness. Hence not two, non duality.


I have no interest in cars as long as mine runs OK and each journey is safe… that’s it. However I do tend to attract folk who are really and I mean really into cars. I’m more of a UFO, Reiki, Ley Line type of guy. I lend my ear to these petrolheads as my partner’s son is also one of these types and when we meet at least I have material to chat about.

It’s all one Consciousness patterning petrolheads, UFOlogists, LGBT, corrupt politicians, Saints and sinners……what a play!

As Its Self.

One just has to read Bishop Berkeley, Rupert Spira and Sri Ananda Krishna Menon then contemplate their words to understand there is no separate self, or an objective world.

All is indeed an intimate experience of sensing, which is really Awareness as itself.


Shakti or the modulation of Shiva/Consciousness is our energetic body that is within us as the chakra and nadi system as well as our aura. Shakti is also the same energy  that patterns others and the ‘outside’ world.

Taking this train of thought to a realization there is an equality, a total sameness between ‘inside’ and ‘outside’. In the game the play of Shiva/Consciousness it modulates the Shakti within us via its own/our experience over lifetimes. Some eddies of energy form knots within the chakra/nadi system; a result of the separate self play. So we get ego identification with likes and dislikes.

The journey back to our Self is merely untying the fundamental knot of identification or false separate idea by self inquiry aka contemplation to see if a separate i.d. is the case.

It can appear that this first knot can be re-tied…maybe. Else it’s just a case of having patience as the other knots, after the first, release during a life time and there is more peace, joy and fearlessness displayed as we go about our daily life.

Shaktipat and Awakening Part 2

I had some previous experience of spontaneous movement qigong which was weird. The insight was there is an energy…chi that moves us and if we relax sufficiently this chi/energy moves the body in certain ways to release tension and open energy pathways or meridians as well as energy spots or chakras. These movements are not premeditated they happen by themselves.

Spontaneous qigong was a precursor to experiencing shaktipat. I feel and believe shaktipat is merely receiving the same energy…chi, but in a really amplified form.

So I sat reading this book ‘The Knee of Listening’ (see Part 1 in this series) and prayed to the Divine to experience the same as the students of Nityananda had received i.e. shakti.  Within seconds my body began moving quite vigorously as I looked at a picture in the book. I was sitting as this happened, while practicing spontaneous qigong I had stood through the process.

Over the next weeks and months I relaxed into a sadhana where I sat and as soon as I did kundalini kriyas would move my body into yogic postures, there would be speaking in tongues, energy would be felt running in my spine and I experienced past life recall.  Each session differed from the last.

A part of me thought I was going mad, another part felt relaxed and had confidence in the process having gone through the qigong exercises earlier.

Today the kriyas are more subtle compared to those early days. In a way looking back I wish I had had a guide, but the theme of my spiritual path so far has been working alone; mainly with esoteric books and my own inner energy.

Next I will write about my journey with Reiki and how this enhanced in particular ways my earlier experiences with the shakti.



Shaktipat and Awakening Part 1

I have had the grace of receiving shaktipat. Shakti or Divine energy permeates every thing, it is the energy of the Universe. I bought a book in a UK charity shop in the mid 90’s called ‘The Knee of Listening’ by Da Free John who since the writing of this book in the 70’s had changed his name several times. Da Free John was an American who as far as I can remember had experiences of what he called the ‘bright’ as a child and which he subsequently realized was the underlying energy/consciousness of reality.

Da Free John later met as a young man a dealer in Eastern artifacts mainly of a religious type called Rudhi. Rudhi had gone to India and had met a realized person there called Bhagavan Nityananda. Nityananda gave Rudhi the spiritual baptism of shaktipat which started a process of inner clearing and awakening of Rudhi’s energy body and consciousness. This process in India was recognized as a kick starter to awakening kundalini.

Back in New York Rudhi set up an Eastern antiques dealership being supplied by a devotee of Nityananda’s. Rudhi held meetings or satsangs where he sat on a stage in his shop and gave shaktipat just through his meditative presence. Da Free John met up with Rudhi and would over time receive shaktipat from him. Eventually Da Free John met another disciple of Nityananda’s, Muktananda in Ganeshpuri India. Da Free John considered Muktananda as his teacher but later reneged this acknowledgement and went onto write that he had attained a higher spiritual state than Muktananda.

In my opinion Da Free John was an eloquent and highly intelligent man but still had less than subtle attachment to his ego. Some would go as far and argue he suffered from megalomania later in life.

So back to this book. It is a long time since I read it but its impact is still doing its do on me or should I say the Shakti is as I received quite a jolt of Shakti from just reading it and looking at the many photos in the book. Following this initiation just by having this book I experienced years of kundalini kriyas and other inner and outer events that awakened me to my/your true nature.  These occurrences are still on going.

I will leave it there and continue in Part 2 which will be a series on ‘Shaktipat and Awakening’ that will include my thoughts and feelings on Reiki.

Your Display.

Amazing how complicated the story of enlightenment can be. What you have to do to get there and what you don’t do to avoid being left out this life time to finding or attaining that happy peace.

Efforting is useful, the kicker however is to question who is the one or what is the efforter?

To save time just realize what is looking at these words, this spiel, is the already awake awareness that has always been you; behind the mental facade of the ego, persona, actor.

The Direct Path is seeing this, you as already awake awareness and standing as that, refuting the relative actions of the ego persona as just that….relative and changeable whilst the screen of presence, the real ‘you’ is and has always been switched on.

Switched off aka the state of suffering is always temporary as we have glimpses of our innate happiness via orgasm, getting what we want (a feeling that is short lived until the next toy we want but never the less a window to remember), seeing a beautiful sunset, walking in a serene forest, eating ice cream etc.

Knowing the fact that all perception is received by you as cognizant presence that the material universe is really your perception and has no objective reality apart from its experience, experienced again by you….Awareness.

Thus the evidence is there is nothing else than this unfolding as it is; including inner fantasy, OBE’s NDE’s, kundalini kriyas and other such or similar fireworks.



Already On Your Throne.

Mountain of Spiritual

Attainment soars



A peak unattainable,

Only for giants such as

Your heroines and heroes.




The get out card

Is the seat you

Sit on…magical!


The ground of your

Own Being here and



You already aware

As perfect nature.

Transparent witness.

To all this.


You as the Base

Camp of Consciousness,

On the pathless recognition